|JJ's (Dec '06) Tips in this issue:
1. Finding Balance Through the Holidays
2. Favorite Quotes
3. Tele-Coaching & Tele-Mentoring
Use the following tips as training tools.
Present this situation to your group and brainstorm solutions together, or submit your own situation question to be answered in an upcoming newsletter.
A reader wrote: Christmas is my favorite time of the year, but the people I work with are depressing me. They are stressed and constantly griping about the difficulty of getting through their workload, and not having time left over to get ready for Christmas too. How can we keep our balance through the holidays when there's too much to do and tempers are short?
Step back from your work obligations and usual preparations for the holidays. Objectively look at what can be postponed in your work until after the holidays and then reprioritize. Make a list of all your holiday
traditions, obligations and duties that you and your family are expected to perform. If either of the lists are overwhelming, you can draft people to help, buy food already prepared, cut corners on the minor things and streamline the process so you have time to enjoy the spirit of Christmas. Enjoy the journey.
Also take care of your health during the holidays and treasure the spirit of Christmas! One Christmas I lost the spirit of Christmas entirely! I was so sick in bed with a bad case of the flu that, on Christmas morning, I dragged myself downstairs to open presents with my family, and then immediately went back to bed. The next morning I felt better and was ready for Christmas, but I had missed it! Yes, I had gone through the motions, but had not felt The spirit of Christmas day! I vowed never to miss it again.
To stay healthy mentally and physically, create positive environments around yourself at work and home.
And remember the technique I've written about many times on handling negative people in your workplace. When you hear a negative comment, say "cancel, cancel" and replace the comment with a positive statement to make it a "Yes, Yes, Yes" environment! And, give permission to others to say "cancel, cancel" to you too. Sometimes we don't know we are sounding Negative. This will help the whole group stay positive and having fun for a healthy holiday season.
Also remember that some people, like your boss or spouse, might be offended with your saying, "cancel, cancel" to their comment, so instead, you can say, "oh" with a slight uplift, and it means the same thing as long as you know it means the same thing. Use this to bring humor and positive attitudes into your environment all year long. Every company or personal group that has adopted this technique has added laughter and fun to their environment which also reduced stress and tension.
This time last year I was in the middle of radiation treatment every day for breast cancer, and I was saying "cancel, cancel" to myself and others a lot. This year, I am thankful to say my health is good, and am back to work helping companies improve their management and customer service skills.
It seems we are constantly reminded that having a positive attitude while dealing with challenges actually predetermines a lot of the outcome. These attitudes, and the way we handle our challenges, are helping us grow into the people we are becoming. It's all about keeping our balance.
>From Balancing Act® newsletter
© 2006 Alan Weiss.
"Techniques for Balance During the Holidays and New Year"
"- Rich and fulfilling beat bigger and louder. A walk to see the holiday lights might be more fulfilling than a boisterous party.
- It takes two to argue. Walk away from fights with family. They never help and they always hurt.
- Plan to pick up the check. If someone else grabs it, then you're pleasantly surprised. If no one else challenges you for it, then you expected it all along and you look magnanimous.
- It's just dumb to binge and then hate yourself after the holidays. Eat and drink what's good for you. If you think about it, there is no augmentation to festivities caused by feeling bloated, stuffed, inebriated, or incapacitated.
- Whatever you plan to budget, double it.
- Gifts are exactly that. If you get some that are unhelpful, inedible, unwearable, or unfathomable, then donate them or return them. It's not like you purchased them and the store cheated you.
- Make a plan to call people you want to call because you can't see them. Write it out with dates and times or you won't get to it and you'll feel terrible later. (Or, worse, they'll call you first yet again.)
- Make a donation to a charity. It's the ultimate gift.
- If you need to do a little work, do it, and stop feeling guilty about it. There's a lot of time in the course of a day, just don't do it when you're expected to be helping out or socializing with others.
- Don't make ridiculous commitments you'll never be able to keep. You'll feel terrible later. Make just those which you can immediately and consistently deliver on: a few things, one step at a time."
"Musings for the Holidays"
"May your Holidays, whatever they are and whatever you celebrate, bring you true peace, at least for the moment.
May your loved ones gather to retell and relive significant events and great stories, without reviving old animosities and jealousies.
May you eat and imbibe with gusto and pleasure, but stay sober and not gain an ounce.
May your plans proceed as intended, and if they are forced to change, may they produce a good laugh and even better results.
May you experience and appreciate the twinkle of a star through moonlit haze, the laughing eyes of a child, the great and unqualified love of a pet.
May you receive a few gifts of true worth and joy, and provide equal pleasure and gratitude even for those others which you're already scheduling for return.
May the night be mild enough to walk outside without a coat, take a deep breath of crisp air, and truly feel enriched and a part of the planet.
May those you love and know who are in harm's way be kept safe. May illness be brief and relieved. May you laugh at the fond remembrance left with you by someone departed, their indelible gift to your life.
May you look around with comprehension and not merely consciousness. May you appreciate what the moment is like, so that looking back on it someday you have the comfort of knowing you enjoyed it at the time.
May you delight in bouncing a ball, petting a dog, preparing a meal, talking sports, seeing a movie. May you truly enjoy watching someone else's slides and they enjoy watching yours.
May you watch the sky and understand it is the same sky, same stars, same rich blackness that the ancients watched millennia ago, and that even in this war-torn world our common humanity is centuries old.
May your true presents be eternal and not ephemeral, the gifts of love, friendship, health, compelling interests, productive work, and a positive attitude.
May you see hope in the darkness, find comfort amidst the noise, and gain wisdom within the tumult.
May you choose not to take a desperate leap into the dark, but rather take a thoughtful walk in what light we have."
>From Balancing Act® newsletter
© 2006 Alan Weiss. All rights reserved.
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